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Big

I really hate the predictability of writing a post like this at the end of December. It’s so cliche, and so not me (she said, her voice dripping sarcasm). I get more retrospective on my birthday or the beginning of the school year than around New Year’s. The fact is, I’ve been working on this post since August. I’ve started and stopped at least three times.  There are so many drafts, on all different topics, just sitting on the virtual editing table. Some of them may eventually be finished and published, some may just gather cobwebs. I’ve actually been writing more in the past few months than I have in a long time, but most of it has been journaling.  I’m probably going to continue focussing on journaling for a while, but I felt like saying a couple of things here.wheresanniebw

This year has been– I can’t really even think of a way to end that sentence. It has been, at the same time, the hardest and happiest year of my life. When I posted in March about my depression, I really didn’t comprehend what that realization meant. When your foe is invisible you don’t realize how big it is; you aren’t as scared of it, but it’s more dangerous. After you see clearly what it is, you’re more able to be afraid of it,  but also more able to fight it. I’m still
depressed, and I’ve lost a lot of weight because of it, but I’m getting help and finding ways to cope. I’ve had self harm relapses, some of them have been pretty bad ones, but the shame that kept me in hiding has lessened. Learning to let go of old ideas and relearn who I am and what I want has been my focus this year, in a way.

School has played a huge part in my life. The post from my first day on campus is almost funny now. For one thing, the gamers are my friends and I can hold my own in a game of Super Smash Bros. I’m pretty sure I remember seeing the person who is now one of my best friends playing that day. Most surprisingly, I’m vice president of one of the most active clubs on campus, and have somehow managed to be on the honors list every semester I’ve been here. The club means so much to me, and a little over a year ago I wouldn’t have even joined. The members have grown to be my friends and often call me mom (especially if I know they have a test coming up). If you had told me at the beginning of last fall that I would not only be considered a good student, but also be elected vice president of this club, I would likely have laughed in your face.

I think I know how to end that sentence now. This year has been big.

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Music

Maybe I’ve been the problem
Maybe I’m the one to blame
But even when I turn it off and blame myself
The outcome feels the same

I’ve been thinkin’ maybe I’ve been partly cloudy
Maybe I’m the chance of rain
And maybe I’m overcast and maybe
All my luck’s washed down the drain

I’ve been thinkin’ ’bout everyone, everyone you look so lonely
But when I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars
I see someone else
When I look at the stars, the stars
I feel like myself

Stars looking at our planet,
Watching entropy and pain
And maybe start to wonder
How the chaos in our lives could pass as sane

I’ve been thinkin’ ’bout the meaning of resistance
Of a hope beyond our own
And suddenly the infinite and penitent
Began to look like home

I’ve been thinkin’ ’bout everyone, everyone you look so empty
But when I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars
I see someone else
When I look at the stars, the stars
I feel like myself, You!

Stars,
Stars

Everyone, everyone you feel so lonely
Everyone, ya everyone you feel so empty
When I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars
I feel like myself
When I look at the stars, the stars
I see someone

Imagine this…I get a phone call from Regis
He says, “Do you want to be a millionaire?”
They put me on the show and I win with two lifelines to spare
Now picture this…I act like nothing ever happened
And bury all that money in a coffee can
Well, I’ve been given more than Regis ever gave away
I was a dead man who was called to come out of my grave
And I think it’s time for makin’ some noise

Wake the neighbors, get the word out
Come on…crank up the music…climb a mountain and shout
This is life we’ve been given made to be lived out
So la la la la live out loud
Live out loud, yeah

Think about this…try to keep a bird from singing
After it’s soared up in the sky
Give the sun a cloudless day and tell it not to shine
Now think about this…if we really have been given
The gift of a life that will never end
And if we have been filled with living hope we’re gonna overflow
And if God’s love is burning in our hearts we’re gonna glow
There’s just no way to keep it in

Wake the neighbors, get the word out
Come on…crank up the music…climb a mountain and shout
This is the life we’ve been given made to be lived out
So la la la la live out loud
Live out loud, yeah

Everybody, come on
La la la…la la la la
La la la live out loud
I want to hear everybody sing
La la la…la la la la
La la la live out loud, loud, loud

Every corner of creation is a living declaration
Come join the song we were made to sing

Wake the neighbors, get the word out
Come on…crank up the music…climb a mountain and shout
This is life we’ve been given made to be lived out
So la la la la live out loud
Live out loud, yeah

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Imports

Hi everyone!

I have imported all the posts from my previous blogs!! YAY!!! Now you can read all of my writings (Because I know you want to 😉 lol).  Ok the real reason is, well, I needed content!!! 

To see what’s been going on with us lately check out my Mama’s blog.

🙂 Andie

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Ice cream is yummy! Ok, That was random! LOL

Hey guys!

Well it’s a new year now, and I figure I better post something now or I might not ever! 

  

1) How old are you? 152) Do you like HSB? It’s not bad

3) How tall are you? 5’8″ at last check

4) Have you seen Madagascar 2? No

5) Do you like Blueberry pie? I don’t know

6) Do you have any Dogs? No

7) What grade are you in? 10th?

8) Do you have an American girl Doll? If you do not do you have a bitty Baby? No and no

~~~~~~~~~~FOOD-OLOGY~~~~~~~~~~~~

What is your salad dressing of choice? Either Caesar or 1000 Island

What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? Applebee’s or O’Charleys

What food could you eat every day and would never get sick of? Umm… Mashed potatoes?
What are your pizza toppings of choice? Bacon or extra sauce
What do you like on your toast? Butter or Nutella
Chocolate or Vanilla? CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~TECHNOLOGY~~~~~~~~~~~~

How many televisions are in your house? 1

What color cell phone do you have? The kid’s cell phone is silver

Do you have a laptop? Daddy does
~~~~~~~~~~~~BIOLOGY~~~~~~~~~~~~

Are you right-handed or left-handed? Right

Have you ever had anything removed from your body? Tooth

What is the last heavy item you lifted? Bubba
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? No

~~~~~~~~~~~~DUMBOLOGY~~~~~~~~~~~~

How many pairs of flip-flops do you own? 0 right now

Last time you had a run-in with the cops? Nevah!

Last person you talked to on the phone? Aunt D

Last person you hugged? LMH
~~~~~~~~~~~~FAVORITE-OLOGY~~~~~~~~~~~~

Season? Spring

Holiday? Valentines?

 

Day of the week? SundayFavorite month? November

~~~~~~~~~~~~CURRENT-OLOGY~~~~~~~~~~~~

Missing someone? Aunt D, Uncle B, Cousin E, Cousin M, O&O

Mood? Lazy
What are you listening to? The computer fans

Watching? the computer screen

Worrying about? Not sure

~~~~~~~~~~~~RANDOM-OLOGY~~~~~~~~~~~~

First place you went this morning? Kitchen

What’s the last movie you saw? LOST IN SPAAAAAAAACE! <Echo echo echo>(60’s version)

Do you smile often? very

Do you always answer your phone? no

If you could change your eye color what would it be? Browner

What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic? Strawberry-Lime-Ade

Do you own a digital camera? Yup

Have you ever had a pet fish? no

Favorite Christmas song(s)?

What’s on your wish list for your birthday? RZ Books, music
Can you do a push up? Sort of

Can you do a chin up? It’s been awhile since I tried

Does the future make you more nervous or excited? excited

Do you have any saved texts? No
Ever been in a car wreck? Yes

Do you have an accent? Kind of

What was the last song to make you cry? Don’t know

Plans tonight? Sleep, study, read
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? Dunno

Have you ever been given roses? Yup

Current hate right now? Back aches

Met someone who changed your life? God

How did you bring in the New Year? Pirates who Don’t do Anything

What song represents you? I don’t know what you mean by that…
Would you go back in time if you were given a chance? Yes

Do you have any tattoos/piercings? My ears are pierced

what songs do you sing in the shower? I don’t much, unless I’m listening to the radio

Ever had someone sing to you? Yes

Do you like to cuddle? Sometimes
Have you held hands with anyone today? No

Who was the last person you took a picture of? Probably LMH

What kind of music did you listen to in elementary? I did not go to elementary

Are most of the friends in your life new or old? Semi-new
Do you like pulpy orange juice? No

What is something your friends make fun of you for? They don’t, if they did they wouldn’t be my friends
Have you ever ridden an elephant? Yep
Do you like to play Scrabble? YES!!!!
What are you saving your money up for right now? Uh Hu…

When is the last time you ate peanut butter & jelly? Don’t remember

What were you doing at 12am last night? Reading Narnia trying to fall asleep <shame>
What was the first thing you thought when you woke up? Don’t know

 

What’s your nickname? Andiewhat’s your favorite food?  Dunno

do you like to dance? Sometimes

do you like pandas? What?

What’s your favorite season? Fall or Spring

have you ever lost a tooth? Yes

how many brothers and sisters do you have? 4

do you have a Mp3? yeah 2

do you like Bob the builder?  ??

What’s your favorite song? The Words I Would Say ~ Sidewalk Prophets

who is your best friend? BP

what are you known for? I don’t know! You tell me!

What’s your favorite movie? Fiddler On the Roof

do you go to the library? Yes I need to go now

who are you going tag next? It seems all my HSB friends have left so If you read this, you’re tagged 😀

 

 

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Up and an Update

Howdy

Well, a lot has happened lately.  Last Monday, Bear and I got our ears pierced at Claire’s.   I can’t take them out for 5 more weeks (about a week before Christmas), and then I have to keep some kind of post in for 6 months.  If anyone tells you it doesn’t hurt, their lying.  It still hurts a little when I clean them.

I also got a haircut! I haven’t had it this short for YEARS! I did get bangs, and long layers around my face. I like the bangs and the front, but the girl put alot of layers in the back too.  It makes my hair not so thick (It’s normaly super thick). I used to complain about it being so thick, I couldn’t do much with it, and even now that it’s not so thick I still can’t. gr.

Today Mom took me and I got my drivers permit.